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I met three women tonight at a party I went to with Hazel. One is a story for much later, if at all. The other two:
Her: She your girlfriend?
Me: No dear, I love someone who doesn't love me.
Her: Whoa, that's a lot of...(hic).
Me: Excuse me?
Her: Sorry, I have the hiccups.
So, because I was pretty sotted, I put my rum down, turned and kissed her.
Her: (surpised) Why'd you do that?
Me: Are the hiccups gone?
Her: (pause, laughing) Yes.
Me: Well then, you can buy me another rum then.
Me: So you're from New Jersey? Are you a vegetarian?
Her: I've NEVER been asked that before. No, but would it matter?
Me: (shrugging) Not even close.
Her: So what's your story?
Me: I'm a pretty, straight boy in NYC looking to drink until I forget things. You?
Her: (thinking) I'm a pretty, straight girl in NYC looking to drink. Buy me one?
Me: No. I'm not that guy. But I'm good for other things.
Her: Like what?
Blah, blah, blah.
Just some interesting stories because if I REALLY had something interesting to do at 3:22 AM, would I be writing this?
I'm a sap, you see...
Music: If I don't get some shelter, oh yeah, I'm gonna fade away