Late Monday night, got the most creepy
phone call ever from HeartGirl
- or, rather, from her and her hella creepy friend. Wanted to take a shower afterwards.
Speaking of which, I met seven women this long weekend. I've been told that the reason I meet so many people is that I've got a really low "creepiness factor." All
people have it; some more than others.
Consider this: HEI had some guy she vaguely knows recently wait on her doorstep unannounced with flowers and wine. He mighta been there for hours. In Hollywood, that's romantic. In the real world, that's creepy
. Let's review, shall we?
Standing outside your ex's home holding a boombox belting out Peter Gabriel.
Real life: Creepy (and stalkerish)
Meeting a girl for 10 minutes and telling her that you're her soulmate.
Real life: Creepy (and pathetic)
Telling someone that they "complete you."This one I particularly loathe - cause who wants someone that isn't whole on their own?
Real life: Creepy (and lame)
Following a girlie around a bar all night because you spoke to her for five minutes.
Hollywood: Creepy - Look, even Hollywood thinks this is creepy. Don't do it.
Real life: Creepy (and something I see every week)
Seriously, there is no line you can say to a girlie, no shirt you can wear, no drink you can buy that will change your ability to talk to a girl than lowering your creepy factor. How to do this is a whole 'nother story.
BTW, HeartGirl called me twice to apologize for her friend; I called her back and we spoke. I think I forgive her. Dunno yet. But I thought it was brave of her to call me back twice to say she was sorry. You get points for being brave in this life.
And because...I know what it's like to wanna be forgiven for the stupid mistakes we make. For the awful, awful things we say and do to one another
Man, I know that oh so well.
I've not slept in three days. I feel like death.
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