Somber day.

Found out through Benlbr that our friend Derek is in the hospital. Hit and run driver. From what I know, it's touch and go; he's not awake. It's very scary. He was the stoner in our show, 72 to Canal.

I don't know him that well but I like him; he's young and talented. I hope very, very much that he gets a chance to be old and talented. I pray he gets that chance.

Like most people in NYC, I run into him in the life. When he first found out that I had taken up photography, he was like a kid in a pot-filled candystore. He's such a good guy.

Wish I could say something profound but the words escape me at the moment.

I'll tell my brother to let you know if anything happens to me. Cause you should know.

We're friends, after all.

----------

With nods to Irnbruise, this guy is selling his entire life online. He's going to walk out of his house with the clothes on his back and his wallet.

I can relate. Of course, I'd take Harold and Syd. No worries. I'll tell if I've gone fishing.

I'd like to start over again where nobody knows me. Have all my stupid mistakes a million miles away. But we all got our baggage, yeah? Even if it's only what we carry inside.

Music: And I'm asking the good Lord "why?" and sigh
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A few weeks back:


I don't have an iPod - don't have an "i" anything, in fact. Someday maybe, not now.

Almost all my music, DVDs, books, papers, works, I've digitized and put into a computer I built myself. I watch it all through either a TV I bought seven years ago or a projector I use for business.

Got alotta Valentino shirts and about eight custom-made suits but I bought 'em all at least a decade ago when I was young and stupid. Tee-shirts and Levi jeans for me.

Drama notwithstanding, I spend coin on:

• Food - mostly groceries to make chili
• Rum
• Harddrives - see above
• Gas
  
• Metrocards
• Coffee
• Mortgage
• Harold, George and Sydney
  

I'm lucky because I've never been cool and I'm WAY too old to start now. Plus, I have zero need to impress anyone.

Where do you think the happiest place on earth is? It's here. Not what you expect, huh? Happiness comes from community and purpose. Stuff cannot make you happy. Don't be fooled by ad execs (I was one) - there's no pill, shirt, shoes, phone, that will make you happy.

Working jobs you hate, to buy crap you don't need, to impress those you don't know - that's just !#@$ nuts.

Connecting, man, that's where it's at. Ah, but there's the rub. Another person cannot make you happy. But losing them can make you all sortsa bent outta shape.

Connecting. It's harder than one might imagine:


--------

20080424:09:30 Edit - The conversations I write of are all taken out of context on purpose. As a general rule, when I write of someone I date, please refrain from writing anything rude of them?

Music: I think she’s leaving Ooh man she’s leaving
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Bedroom 7:00
Radio snaps on. McCain, Clinton, Obama. War. Housing market. Sigh. Six hours sleep. Very good. Situps (auf deutch) ...48...49...50. Rub eyes. Check computer next to bed. Geek, me. Stretch. Stumble outta bed, stumble to kitchen.

Kitchen 7:08
Two cups coffee. Peanut butter & marmalade sandwich. Spoonful of ice cream. Protein shake. Gag.

Living Room 7:14
Push-ups (yung zhong wen)...48...49...50. 10 minutes of fencing. Sambrada three, four & five, right handed. Double-handed. Left-handed. Espada y daga. Wonder why they never made a sequel to The Princess Bride.

Bathroom 7:35
Wash hands. Brush teeth. Consider combing hair. Don't.

Living Room 7:38
Blue jeans. Black shirt. Grey socks. Good Morning America. Shut down computer. Pen. Wallet. Money. Mobile. Headset. Computer bag. Goodbye George, Goodbye Harold, and Goodbye Sydney.

Outside 8:00
Shut door. Lock gate.

Deep breath...

Music: I read the news today, oh boy
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I may take one of No. 6's cats. Besides the mouse issue, I miss having a pet that doesn't swim in its own waste.

Unfortunately, my last conversation with her was decidedly unpleasant. While I like the thought of having a cat that I'm used to, I'm worried it's gonna come with baggage.

No more baggage for this bright-eyed, bushy-tailed, Asian boy, thanx.

Plus, I've never had a little kitten before; that might be kinda cool.

But we'll see.

I wonder how Harold's gonna take it.

Music: After all the b__s__ I’ve heard It’s refreshing
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Music: we used to be the best of friends
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