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Thursday, November 19th, 2009
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8:52 am - Fridays Online
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| Tuesday, November 17th, 2009
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8:30 am - Monuments
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DC was nice, as always.
Went there and back via train. Neither my life nor the trains I ride run on (or close) to schedule.
The weather was amazing on Sunday so we took a walk to Lincoln and Vietnam Memorial. Turns out the reflecting pool does actually reflect - it's a mobile phone shot but y'can still see it.
Nuthin like it on a nice sunny day with the blue sky.
Went to the Vietnam Memorial for the first time. Quite something. Dunno if y'know this but Ross Perot sponsored a design competition for it and when Maya Lin, a 21 year-old Asian nobody - a gook - won it with a black slab, he and a tona others were pissed. Onea them shouldn't be building a Vietnam Memorial.
The New York Times, headlined, Insulting Vietnam Vets. Where were the statues, the flags? Looked like a tombstone.
Kinda reminds me of alla the political ruckus over everything these days. Everyone's so sure they're right; all this sound and fury signifying nuthin.
So a few meters away from the memorial that was actually built, Perot had a statue put up.
A teenage girl was talking on her cell phone when I went to visit and about a third of the way in, think she finally realized what she was reading, hung up her phone, and quietly walked the resta the way.
Ross Perot, Pat Buchanan, all the critics did similar things when the actually saw the thing. Every organization that attacked Maya later apologized.
Cause Maya knew that when you put up names, a lista people kids that got themselves killed for a country that hated them, it's hard to ignore that they existed.
It's quite something.
Music: I'm down to a whisper In a daydream on a hill
YASYCTAI: Have you taken a walk lately? Y'should. (60 mins/1 pt)
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current mood:  grateful
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| Thursday, November 12th, 2009
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8:53 am - Me Again
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At the enda Interview with Vampire, we find out this once wild vampire's alive. But he's a shella himself - scared and scarred.
Hold that thought.
Contrary to what most people think, the fast food fight isn't between McDonald's and Burger King. McDonalds has about 31,000 stores across the world but Subway will have more than 32,000 by the end of the year. Cause during this yeara horrible economic times, Subway profits grew by 17%.
It went from number whatever to number one cause it saw it's chances and took them.
And Wayne Gretzky said that, You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. It's all about seeing your chances and taking them.
There's been debate as to JFK's notion that the Chinese word for crisis is an amalgam of the characters danger and opportunity - but that doesn't make it less true a concept. Crisis's when y'can take your shots.
The breakup, the theft, the car accident, my grandmother leaving, and the cancer scare took their toll on me. Once told someone that as a lawyer, a fencer and a kickboxer, wasn't afraida nuthin. But the last three years, was scared and scarred. Of everything (cept maybe the girlies).
A body can only handle so many crises.
Three years's enough to not take my shots, to be onea those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.
After three years, a twelveth of my life, not only am I home again, feel like I'm me again.
Gonna be in DC over the weekend. Catch you next week.
Music: Please allow me to introduce myself
YASYCTAI: Take your shots. (0.5 secs/3 pts)
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current mood: refreshed
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| Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
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7:42 am - Five miles in Manhattan
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Me: Too nice a day to wrestle. Wanna take a walk?
Her: Sure.
Me: I think they extended the bike path on the west side. We can walk down the new park.
Her: That sounds like fun. Can we go to the High Line? Me: Sure. (later) ...that is if we can ever find the entrance.
Her: It's funny, being tourists in your own city.
Me: I like it. It Reminds me of why I like this place so much.
Her: Do you want to walk to Trader Joe's? Me: (pointing) It's past that white building with the blue clock over there. Her: (amused) I've been to Union Square before, you know.
Me: Yes, I know. (laughing) I just pretend you never had a life before me.
Music: Never know what we will see. Come take a walk with me.
YASYCTAI: Enjoy the nice days before they're gone. (240 mins/1 pt)
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current mood:  artistic
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| Thursday, November 5th, 2009
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9:12 am - Durian
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| Tuesday, November 3rd, 2009
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9:12 am - Halloween 2009
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Her: Pennsylvania's not that far. It's only two hours away.
Me: Good grief, woman... HG: (finishing) ...that's exactly how far we thought it was!
Stopped by PB's where I had my body weight in pixie sticks and rum after the rain. Heartgirl and I wore Star Trek uniforms that were way too big on us. Either medium in America isn't what it used to be or I'm shrinking. Just realized right this moment that for the past five Halloweens, wore red.
Him: ...so then I was like, "You're the class of 2013? That's crazy!" Me: Tell me about it - that's 20 years after I graduated. Him: (surprised) Wait, what? How old're you? Me: 36 - it's the Asian genes. Plus I drink the blood of a white baby every morning. Him: (nodding) Of course, who doesn't?
Another Halloween done and gone. Suppose it'll be just a mattera time fore I'm the old dude that still gets dressed up for Halloween. I'm ok with that.
Me: Goodness, I do love Halloween. And women exercising questionable clothing choices. 72Suburbs: We love it, too. There're so few chances to exercise questionable taste Me: God bless you, 72Suburbs. God bless you.
Saw RE Mike last night. He's been making lotsa deals and picked himself up a nice one-bedroom downtown. We were talking shop over some $6 Halal food and a bottlea red.
Me: ...so you walked outta the bank with $40K in cash to put a down payment on this place cause some guy dared you to? Him: I did get a little carried away. Me: Y'know if I were there, totally woulda robbed you. Him: Course. (phone rings) Speaking of which, this dude calling me's in jail. Been there for two months. Me: Why do you still talk to him? Him: No idea (picking up phone) yeah...
Also met up with the lawyers been working with on some things. Went out to this crazy nice Italian joint and met their wives. Super nice, alla them. Says a lot about you when you meet someone's favourite person and they're exactly like y'thought they'd be.
November 2009, already. Where does the time go?
Music: you should be wilder, you're no fun at all
YASYCTAI: Buy next year's costume early. Never hurts to be prepared. (20 mins/0.5 pts)
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current mood:  groggy
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| Thursday, October 29th, 2009
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8:45 am - Ring
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I haz Mac.
The little nerd is me's doing cartwheels.
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Left my ring at the wrestling mat the other day. When I first got it years ago, my mom was certain that I'd lose it within a few months.
It's the only piece of jewelry I wear on a regular basis. It's actually not the ring you see above, mine's silver and black - pretty sure that if you look at some pics, it'll be there.
It's not so much that it's my college ring but that my parent's got it for me. Back then, they never're ones for frivolous things like rings, which made it all that more important to me.
Was all panicked that someone woulda heisted it but the owner of the gym said she found it and kept it for me. Picked it up the very next day. 18 years I've had it.
Onea the few things wouldn't sell or part with for anything.
Music: been waitin' all my life, and now I found you
YASYCTAI: Clean out the junk on your harddrive. Jeez, there's a lotta junk. (hrs/1 pt)
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current mood: awake
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| Tuesday, October 27th, 2009
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12:01 am - Breaking up is hard to do
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Posting on Tuesday and Thursday mornings starting Thursday (yawn).
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Her: (backing away) Please don't eat that. Me: It's fine. Her: I'm begging you not to eat that. It's got to be rotten. Me: It's fine. I'll microwave it, it'll kill everything. Her: (gagging) I can't...I can't... Me: (pressing buttons) What? I'll put mustard on it. It'll be fine. Her: (exiting kitchen) I'm gonna be sick... Me: (opening microwave) It's fi..whoa. Maybe that is bad. (thinking) Nah... ----------
Windows;
Yes, it's true. It is Mac. Didn't mean for it to happen. Just did. Your suspicions were right, we were together those times when my brother brought her by the place.
If it makes it any better, dunno why it might, it's not like I traded in for some younger model as she's older than you. Say this cause I know that her looks have made you jealous in the past and wanted to tell you that you look, honestly, as good as she does or even better now. The work that you had done late this month was really stunning. Really.
But - it's not been your looks. It never really has. It's just the times you left me hanging. Waiting. Hoping that this time, this time would be different.
And it just never was.
Gave you everything y'asked for: RAM, done. Bigger Harddrive, there. Speedier videocard, bam. Never enough.
And a relationship's not just about the parties involved, it's also what they come with, their family's. The Dells, the Toshibas, the HPs - the HPs were the worst - they were, to be polite, never what they seemed to be.
We spent almost 20 years together - 20 years! Defended you when everyone was against you. But y'never did the same for me.
Can't take the constant disappointments. Waited until now, after your latest operation and, like I said, you look and work amazingly. Sometimes, a relationship's too damaged to repair. too little, too late.
Y'still have your admirers and your new looks. But I gotta go and do right by me. Not outta your life forever, though. Y'can't just walk away from two decades of shared memories just like that.
But you're not my number one gal anyone and for that, I'm sorry. Can't spend another two decades waiting for you to get it right.
Logan
Music: just can't keep on running away so it stops today
YASYCTAI: Get your teeth cleaned. I wanna make out with someone if only cause my teeth feel amazing. (60 mins/2 pts)
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current mood:  coughy
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| Thursday, October 22nd, 2009
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12:14 am - Still (sorta) Goal-Oriented
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Back to our regularly scheduled nonsense. Told y'about the pic above, yeah?
Him: Can I tell y'something? Me: Y'know me, I'm a vault. Nuthin you've ever told me in a decade's ever come out. Him: (sarcastically) Yeah right, what about that time you got hammered on Scotch and you told everyone about...wait a sec, that was me. Me: Sheyeah...
Ran around Chinatown today and stopped by Rain's. He and I're somewhat unique in that we both got enormous NYC pads despite, or perhaps resulting in, our never having any coin.
Now he's got dogs now running all over the joint. Not a dog person myself. Not an animal person in general - unless they're slow roasting with some lemon and salt. Kidding! (sorta)
Y'know, this book Animals Make Us Human says that all animals are wired to feel four emotions - three negative and one positive. They wanna avoid:
- pain
- fear; and
- panic; but they desire
- a goal. Any goal.
Cattle, apparently, are pretty happy cause they got all four.
Think we're the same way. Said it before, the purpose of life is to have purpose. Realized tonight that my best friend was missing having a goal and that was getting to her.
Back to Rain, we (sorta) got a new goal - pitched him another non-income producing art project along the lines of Bachelor Cooking and 72nd to Canal - and he seemed to be pretty positive about it.
Lemme piece something together and we'll see what happens.
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Also in the book is that, apparently, we never know what cats're thinking cause they don't have eyebrows.
Music: Comment faire verrai-je un jour la fin de ce calvaire
YASYCTAI: What are your goals for the day? Week? Month? Year? (60 mins/2 pts)
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current mood:  busy
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| Wednesday, October 21st, 2009
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12:01 am - Leigh Sakoda
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Apologies, I interrupt our usual nuthin for a quick something.
If you've been reading this for any amount of time, y'know that real names are verboten. Unless there's a good reason.
This was Lee - Leigh Sakoda, actually. She wasn't a close friend, or a dear friend. She was, however, someone that I spoke to every day for two years at my old gig. And never will again. That means something to me.
Wish I dropped her a line like I said I would. That means something to me too.
Since I got no scratch right now to send her way, putting this up for now, to remind me to do it when I do.
In my head, she looked like that pic above, always smiling. The world's lost a good soul.
Back to the usual nonsense tomorrow.
Nite, Lee.
Music: to everything there is a purpose
YASYCTAI: Do you donate time, or money, or something? Y'should if only to give something back to the aether. (120 mins/2 pts)
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current mood:  still pensive
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| Tuesday, October 20th, 2009
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12:01 am - Conversations on life
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Me: How high's your blood pressure?
Her: XXX over XXX. Me: HOLY COW! Eat some oatmeal, mom! Her: I can't, I'm having a mango. Me: (exasperated) I didn't mean right now...
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HG: Why couldn't you sleep? Me: Was screwing around online and got a notice from a friend that a girl I worked with passed away. She just got married. Cancer. Thing is, had her email addy the whole time. Kept thinking I'd drop her a line but..never did. Dunno why. Her: (patting my shoulder) I'm sorry about your friend. Me: She wasn't a friend so much as someone I knew. But she always said "Hi" to me. It's just that she was younger than me. Seems so unfair. Never woulda thought...
Still believe that A man’s dying is more the survivors’ affair than his own. But she was too young to go, I think.
Went to church this past Sunday. It's hard to have faith in the big city.
It's hard to have faith when you're at an age where everyone's getting older, people y'know die, madmen say'n do mad things. Doesn't make any damn sense.
But there's this song that has this line that goes, Thank goodness for the good souls that make life better. So I turn to you and I say, if it wasn't for the good souls, life would not matter,
Me: It's a girl! Congrats! And...um...I'll be in Mexico...for the forseeable future. Him: (laughing) I swear, if she starts talking a lot with her hands, I'll find you. Me: Don't blame me that my people's gene's are strong.
Thank God for the good souls.
Bye, Lee. It sounds like you had lotsa good souls around and I hope they make it through this somehow. I'm sorry you had to go. You were way too young to go.
YASYCTAI: Gotta start making some of those phone calls. (15 mins/1 pt)
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current mood: pensive
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| Thursday, October 15th, 2009
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12:05 am - What I do, how I do it
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My leg's not fallen off. This is a good sign. You'll be apprised, should the situation change.
Still sick though. Can't shake this damn cough.
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Went out to Brooklyn today for a potential gig. Never know if it'll actually happen but y'gotta go for every thing out there when you eat what you kill.
Sometimes y'land a whale; most times it's just sardines.
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My brother's trying to convince me to get a Mac. Problem's that I'm so useda doing what I do, how I do it.
Rain once said,
Imagine if y'go to a bar and there're beautiful women everywhere. Y'walk up to the hottest broad, say something, and she loves it. And everything y'say to every women works.
In real life the bar sucks, the women are only ok and nuthing y'ever say to them works.
The first part's like working with programs on a mac, the second's the crap you use.
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Halloween's coming up. Dunno what it's like where you are, but here in the Big City, it's carte blanche for the girlies to tart it up.
Halloween rocks.
Music: In this world it's hard to get it right
YASYCTAI: It's time to buy a costume. Y'gotta, cause if y'wait any longer, you'll spent $70 for a jedi robe that doesn't fit properly and go to a party where it's all dudes who did the same things. (15 online mins/0.25 pts)
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current mood:  rushed
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| Tuesday, October 13th, 2009
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12:01 am - Lovely Tupperware
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 (c) bernard chatreau
Me: That's not how it looks. Her: How does it look? Me: At dusk, the 7 train would be packed with Asian teenagers. That's totally fake.
Just saw the remake of Pelham 123 - the last scene shows someone riding the 7 train pretty much by his lonesome. The 7 train, in the early evening, is never that empty. Moreover, even when it is slightly empty, there's always a dozen or so Asian teenagers on board at any given time.
I should know, I was onea them growing up.
1 hour 14 minutes into the film, there was a single shot of an Asian for a second.
Not onea those Asian activists - in fact this may be my only post in three years that even discusses what I am and not who I am - but it does bug me when we're completely figuratively whitewashed outta of a movie.
Then again, it doesn't really matter to me. Cause film's all fantasy anywho. Reality is, we're all up in this joint.
Funny thing is, who's fantasy is it where you see onea us for only a second?
Have you met us? We're lovely.
And when you order food from us, we give you tupperware.
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Me: Got a small abscess in my leg like last time and just spent the last 20 minutes digging it out with a knife and toothpicks. Question, do I have to keep hacking at my leg until I see blood? Him: You may be the dumbest smart person I know.
Word of advice: If you find yourself low on rum, with a painful wound, a large hunting knife, several toothpicks, some gauze and alcohol, it's never rarely a good idea to do self-surgery. A conference with the Professor indicates that perhaps the wrong course of action was chosen.
I'm my own worst enemy, a danger to myself. In other news, I'll be visiting the pharmacy tomorrow. Purpose: Painkillers and antibiotics.
Said we're lovely, never said we're particularly bright. I mean, we'll stomp all over that curve but still...
Music: Too late for the young gun This is the year of the knife
YASYCTAI: If you had to, would you know how to take care of a wound? If not, pick up a book. (120 mins/1 pt)
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current mood: ill
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| Thursday, October 8th, 2009
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12:01 am - Clear
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| Tuesday, October 6th, 2009
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12:01 am - Words
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Her: You getting closer to normal.
Me: You mean, "normalcy." Her: (shaking head) Well, you just took a step back.
Woke up this morning and fixed myself a killer filtered ground bean soup with cow-baby food. But just cause I can't go a day without it, also had some roasted mashed peas with pre-digested insect vomit and baked wet flour along with it. Big fan of insect vomit. Especially when I'm sick. Wish I had liquid from a citrus reproductive unit to go with it but no luck.
Heartgirl just boiled some water with vegetables and dissolved insect vomit cause my cold's coming back.
Stupid cold.
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Agree with Obama's assertion that the phrase, Just words, is insulting. Words're how we organize the world around us, not just to other people but to ourselves.
Was out with my girl the other day and we heard a guy just screaming obscenities at the top of his lungs in middle of Columbus Circle. And the people around him were visibly uncomfortable.
Look, sometimes few things match the situation better than expletive. And sometimes, y'gotta cut some people slack cause it's the only vocabulary they got.
But what if it's not? Cause, sometimes cursing's just cursing, and that's fine. But sometimes cursing's showing the other person how y'process the world.
And that might not be what y'want.
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Woke up this morning and fixed myself a killer cafe au lait. But just cause I can't go a day without it, also had some peanut butter and honey on a biscuit with it. Big fan of honey. Especially when I'm sick. Wish I had some lemon juice to go with it but no luck
Heartgirl just made me some tea with honey cause my cold's coming back.
Damn cold.
Music: lemme light your candle, cause mama I'm sure hard to handle
YASYCTAI: Clean up that stack of magazine: read or toss. (240 mins/2 pts)
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current mood: still sick
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| Thursday, October 1st, 2009
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12:55 am - Art beneath the canopy glow
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Ended up making pizza. Tasted great, looked terrible. Gonna try again and take some pics for you.
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Late posting cause I spent the last two hours trying to get an oversized print of Hopper's Nighthawks. If you're in Chicago, y'should really see it in the museum - never have myself.
If y'ever came by my pad, you'd see that my walls are bare except for one thing my pop drew for me once.
But, realized that barren walls don't make a home, so been looking for some artwork with my very limited scratch.
Hopper's got a good sensea how solitary the city's sometimes. Y'can have someone surrounded by people and still by yourself; or even be at home with someone and still be by your lonesome, like his Room in New York.
Sides him, kinda partial to vintage posters like the kind below.
Thing is that, always thoughta home as someplace else. George Carlin useta say something like, a house is just the place where y'keep your stuff. So, I was never one to get even more stuff, like artwork.
But, being 36, suppose it's time to call a place home already, yeah? Ergo, stuff. Ergo, art.
This's my first real piecea artwork that I've not made myself.
Tell me something, what else should I consider?
Music: accounts of peace while passed beneath the canopy glow
YASYCTAI: Tell me what art y'like. (5 mins/0.5 pts)
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current mood: frustrated
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| Tuesday, September 29th, 2009
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12:01 am - Either Sick or Awake
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| Thursday, September 24th, 2009
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12:01 am - Brighten
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Started the day talking myself outta one parking ticket but not the other. Stupid parking/driving rules.
Heard that before Brooklyn became parta NYC in 1898, it was like the 11th largest city in the nation or somethin like that.
Gotta believe it cause I got crazy lost out there today. Ended up on Brighton Beach where every street seems to be named Brighton.
This empty parking spot came up on my left so I figured it was a sign and pulled in.
Stepped out and stood on the beach looking at the blue sky. Thought to myself that my city's really got it all. Snapped a coupla pics and slid back into my car for 90 minutes of traffic to go 19 miles. My day got better brightened after that.
Rushed home to spend my night with my girl for the first time in a while. Not exactly as I hoped.
Check that. NYC's got it all cept for reasonable driving and parking. Sides that, we got it all.
Him: This is different, I really like her.
Me: You always say that, and you always really like them. Him: Come on, this's different. Few people ever do what we did. (pause) OK, you did but besides you... Me: Everybody thinks their thing's special. Maybe it is, but give it time to find out.
There're plentya times people think something's something, but turns out to be a whole lotta nuthin.
Music: wanna bathe you in the light of day
YASYCTAI: Go to another parta town y'always said you'd go to. (120 mins/1 pt)
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current mood:  hella beat
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| Monday, September 21st, 2009
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11:42 pm - Not out to hurt nobody
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My friend's having a bad day so I rang her. Wanted to tell her that daylight comes after the dark. Didn't get the chance. It's not a platitude, just simple truth. Hopefully she still reads me.
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Her:...left of the overpass. There's usually parking there. Me: Got it. Oh and it's a trestle not an overpass cause it's for a train not car. Just thought y'should know... Brother: (muttering in passenger seat) It's troubling that you know that.
My brother came to visit me over the weekend so gave him the keys to my apartment. I've three doors and never lock the third one. But for some inexplicable reason, locked it.
So the poor guy was outside in the cold at 5AM for two hours. He called WM who insisted on driving in from across the river, to drop him off at the 'rents. Took about an hour. Both said it wasn't a big deal. They're just too nice t'get mad at me. S'ok, I'm mad at myself. ---------- Her: Long Island? Why are you taking a class in Long Island? Me: They have a steak dinner afterward. Her: You're going all the way out to Long Island just for that? Me: Did y'not hear what I said? They have a steak dinner afterward. Her: But it's all the way out... Me: (slowly) Steak...dinner.
current mood: sympathetic
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(8 comments | comment on this)
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| Thursday, September 17th, 2009
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12:01 am - Support
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KG Betty called me tonight from Korea to tell me the news.
Me: $50,000?! How big is something like that? Her: Three carats. Me: Jeez! Considering how short you are, y'should just wear it around your neck. Like Flavor Flav.
OK, I didn't say the Flavor Flav line, but I totally wanted to.
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Different conversation with a different woman.
Her: Did your parents support your decisions growing up?
Me: Well, not so much during the 80s, 90s and 2000s. (pause) But I'm hoping this year'll be different. Her: (pause then laughter)
They've actually always been mostly supportive of the truly questionable decisions my siblings and I've made in our past. Which is not to say they weren't typical in some respects, like our education, but they gave us a good amount of latitude. For that, I'm grateful.
My pastor once said that everything in our lives can be traced back to being born to the parents we were born to. That's so true - imagine your life if you were born to a Somalian farmer or a North Korean soldier.
My brother called me recently in the middle of the night. Apparently, my dad got lost. The thing is, he doesn't get lost. He just doesn't. Especially not in near home.
It's a small thing, yeah. But it bothers me greatly.
Me: Y'ok? Him: Me? Don't worry, I'm fine. I just got a little...confused. Me: (pause) Hey, I'm gonna come home for dinner this weekend. Him: Oh, that's great! I'll cook. Me: (slowly) Yeah, sounds great...
Music: You and me got so much to prove
YASYCTAI: Check in with people. (20 mins/1 pt)
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current mood:  guilty
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